Last of My lil Coffee Cake :)

I finally have some strength to look at Coffee’s pics n dug up this adorable pic of mine with her that i took on 5th Dec 2012

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Lil adorable soul, Love her to bits n miss her always. 🙂
Just wanted to share it all before i move on with life and other beautiful things heading my way. Am sure she is up there happy for me and jumping here n there like she always did.

Date of Birth: 6th March 2012
Date of Buying her: 15th July
Date of Selling her:17th Feb
Date of her Death: 18th April
Cause of Death: A home Accident, some thing fell on her n broke her jaw n she died on the operation table 😥

It still feels unreal n i really hope the guy lied to me n sold her off to some one else n shes still alive. 😦

Bigggggg Hugssssssssss to her.

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Run Down Event Updates

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Helloo Allll

i figured if i start writing every event that i wanna share in flowery tone n details and what not i might never be able to get to the end of it, so instead i will just do a simple run down with may b dates and events and a lil comment about it so that i can get over with it, not that its gonna b too much fun any more that way n with no pictures, but i guess that’s the best way possible for now. Otherwise the LAZY ME will never get on with it. So here i am breaking the ice!!!

10th January: Hubby n I came back from Thailand (our long awaited Honeymoon trip of 10 days), over all it was amazing, plus my best friend lives there so was a good reunion too, had a lovely time there, also had a 2 nights 3 days short visit to Pattaya. Simply loved it 🙂

12-15th January: Attended my friend’s wedding here, was the main reason to come back to early otherwise i prolly wud have stayed back with my friend and hubby cud have come back for his work, but i guess every thing happens for a reason and am glad i came back with hubby 🙂

27th January: I found out the best news of my life, the news i had been waiting for, for sooo long 😀 YES i am pregnant 😀 yayyy feels good to finally let it out on my blog here hehe. Hence it was nice i came back with hubby, he was the happiest on the news offcourse, so were my family n in-laws  Actually on 26th i just did a random test and i was sooo sure it wud be just one line and i thot to my self fine i will do it, not like am preggy, but when i saw a faint line i FREAKED out, i instantly took the pic of the strip n sent it to my best friend (god bless whatsapp) and she called and asked me to take another test which i did and the line was much clearer. but i wasn’t gonna get my hopes high, so on 27th i went with my mom in law (since we live with her) n got my blood test done in the morning. I came back from the clinic n then broke the news to Hubby that I think ur gonna be a daddy 🙂 i chked the result online at 3pm and it confirmed i was very much Pregnant. LOL now that i let it out here, i wanna keep writing it again n again lol (crazy excited me)

17th February: I had started to feel that i couldn’t take care of Coffee, (for new readers) the new poodle pup i had gotten in July 2012. I would still have to leash her every time i took her out for a pee and she wud wanna run and resist, the pulls started to give me strain and pressure in my abdomen and i knew with time i will totally not be able to take care of her, and hubby is mostly busy at work, so i cant expect him to be available for her walk around needs, so i had to take a decision and on 17th Feb i sold her, hoping she wud have a good life and will be taken good care of, since the guy who got her was all happy and stuff. so with a heavy heart i let her go. but the good thing was that she just went away, well in a way it was weird coz she didn’t even stop to look back she was all too happy to be going. good it was coz i knew she wud adjust there and wont have a problem  sad coz it made me feel that i still haven’t been able to make her MY DOG. Hubby had a big face made for 2 days coz he was too sad and wanted to keep her but i knew he will not be able to take responsibility as needed with time and it was best to let her go

3rd March: My doc told me that i really need to rest and take things easy, coz i kept feeling heavy and crampy and she said its not good. so i had some good long bed rest, Kept going to shops for various things on n off but mostly was trying to take things easy. LOL cant help it i am a restless soul 😛

21st March: i hadn’t told my gang till now, n it was getting frustrating, i wanted to just shout out my news, am not the person ti keep my happiness to my self but like every one says let the 3 months pass, let the risky time go and wat not, so by now I couldn’t hold the news any long and just HAD to share it with my gang so on 21st i arranged a dinner at my place, called my gang of 8 couples, after the dinner while the girls were collecting plates n clearing the table “Hibs” told me how she and “Nom” talked on their way to our place n guessed y i had called all on dinner, she said i said mayb she is expecting, or mayb her hubby got a promotion (they forgot my hubby works for himself so there’s no point of promotion :P) , i just looked at her smiled and said hey cant i call u all for dinner without any reason? 😛 hehehhe. Later all settled on sofas and i finally broke the news to “Natz” who had predicted last year that this year all of us will get preggy. so i told her dude ur prediction is true. and told “Hibs” ur discussion in the car was right, n then i started to blush lol. i swear it was totally unintentional. Hearing this Ana, K and M also jumped with happiness and they all congratulated me. The guys congratulated my hubby. It finally felt good to tell them and not have to lie why i am not making any plans or getting tired every time i go to their place and have my back aches and what not hehhee, i could finally b open to them 🙂 the girls screamed and danced and started going crazy about how they wanna arrange my baby shower lol i tell u they are some real crazy girls, n i love them to bits :)))

20th April: The guy who took Coffee called and informed that she expired 2 days back. had a slight accident in their store, where she was with his wife and some thing fell from the top shelf and broke her jaw. he took her to the hospital and the doc started to operate but she cudnt make it and died on the table. 😥 After hearing this i was furious with the guy that he cudnt take care of her n all. i was too sad, but later i also thought, now i might be selfish here but i thought that If she had to go at this time anyways am kinnda glad she was not in front of me, Coz i wudnt have had been able to deal with it especially with my slightly high rick pregnancy. 😦 May she rest in peace. I will always love her, I would attach her pic here for new readers but am still not able to see her pics, it still hurts. so those who don’t know about her can just scroll in my blog and see my pretty lil coffee cake. 🙂

27th April: Today i finally thot its about time that i share stuff otherwise i will keep sitting and before i know it it will be the end of this year. Now i will also start my preggy updates so those who are not much eager about it IF i mean may ignore it 🙂 Up till now i have been writing an every day diary of wat i eat, what i feel, symptoms, and any movements and wat i felt about them.my doc appointments and what meds she told me when, and when i had my ultrasounds, how my weight is going and stuff like that just so i keep an over all record, and also will may b telly it with my next pregnancy if needed. 🙂

Aaaah 🙂 Finally I can start from every day stuff i hope i don’t lazy out now 🙂 Hope u all enjoy my run down post. Keep coming back for more

love u allll n big hugssssssss

xoxoxooxoxooxoxox

Intense

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!!!Intense !!!

With you i am so different
things that i have never done before
things that never happened
every thing comes to me, when am with u
when i talk to u, i feel so good
so much enlightened, so mcuh satisfied
i feel so much in love with u
so much complete
as if i found my soul mate
you are there with me all the time
you are always on my mind
with you i feel so intensly loved
you make me feel so good
as if i was never loved before
all i think the entire day
all that i can say is that
I love you so much
and the feeling is soo intense
that i just cant explain

Tya!
6th April 2000′

Arrested

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!!!Arrested!!!

With you i am never alone
coz with u i feel surrounded with love
each day u make me feel different
each day u make me feel complete
though therez nothing much between us right now
but i love the way u make me feel loved
i loved the way u wrapped ur arms around my leg
where i stood beside you while u were sitting
i loved the way u wrapped ur arms around me
even though we were standing in a crowd
we were infront of so many ppl
when u kept ur arm on my shoulder n dragged me near
i loved the way ur hand moved on my back
n played with my hair
while i rested i head on ur knee
my heart stopped with anticipation
when you grabbed my hand and asked me
“wat are u trying to do to me”
with ur head tilt on side
and eyes filled with confusion
i loved the way i pushed u in the corner
and u let ur self loose, n allowed me to kiss u
i loved the way u tried to protect me
during the water war in the ground
i loved the way u first held my hand “Knowingly”
but looked at me n said “excuse me?”
as if u didnt do any thing and were innocent
I love the way u make me feel loved n cared
& i might never be able to thank you
for all the things that u make me feel
i love the way u say “Dont go”
just before i put the phone down
i love the way u arrest me in ur thoughts
n i like to request you for just one thing today
Never Set Me Free
for i want to be arrested
in your thougth forever

Tya!
4th April 2000′

‘Sawal’ (Question)

This post was originally written in Urdu, hence translating under each verse in english so that more people can understand this post :)… thank you for reading

‘Sawal’ (Question)

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Guzartey they jiss key liye har rooz us gali sey
Woh dil ab in sey tera sawal kerta hai

*the path they took every day for whom
that heart now questions them about you*

Ssaathi bhi bichar gaye, mahboob bhi na paya
Yeh zamana ab in un sey tera sawal kerta hai

*lost friends and never got a lover
this world now questions them about you*

Judda kiya tu ney khud ko jiss sey
Woh khud apney aap sey tera sawal kerta hai

*you separated yourself from whom
the one now asks themselves about you*

Bitaye they saath jo shab-o-roz her su
Woh mosam ab in sey tera sawal kerta hai

*spent days and nights with the one
that season now questions them about you*

Bikhrey hain kiss key dil key tukrey yon
Woh shaks ab khuda sey tera sawal kerta hai

*the heart thats been shattered so badly
that person now asks God about you

Guzartey they jiss key liye har rooz us gali sey
Woh dil ab in sey tera sawal kerta hai

*the path they took every day for whom
that heart now questions them about you*

Tya!
12th Dec 2000′

5 Minute Friday – GOOD BYE!

5 Minutes Friday is hosted by  The Gypsy Mama every Friday where we write for five minutes right from the heart without self-editing, no backtracking or over-thinking on a given prompt.

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Then link up at The Gypsy Mama’s to see what others have to say and to encourage each other’s efforts.

Today’s prompt: GOOD BYE

Ready…. Go

Good bye, as simple as it sounds its very hard to say, especially when you are saying it to some one you know is going out of ur life for good. How do you let that attachment, that love, that intensity for the person just go to ashes in the burning flame of a simple good bye so easily??? its soo difficult to just stand there, face your fears and tell that one person who meant the world to you, that its the end? a good bye?
you need alot of courage and strength to do it, knowingly, it kills you but still you have to be strong, for your self and for the other.

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Wish it was as easy as saying it, things would be much simple. the hurting heart needs to lay back, the tears ready to fall from the corner of the eye needs to stay there a bit longer, the heart beating so fast needs to calm down a lil, the skin blushing with emotions needs to cool off a bit longer, till one is told off, Given a farewell………… A final good bye!

STOP!

Okay, it’s your turn.  I look forward to reading your thoughts.

*Relation*

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We shared a Relation
that i wanted to treasure
the relation of friendship
Relation that i wanted to last
but i lost it sumhow
when you were around
i had no fears
I was confident n proud
of being with you
it made me happpy
to call u my friend
we shared a special thing
a relation beyond the thoughts
our hidden feelings n love within
made the relation more stronger
i dont know where you are now
but when ever i think of you
I miss you more then ever

Tya!
29th Oct 97′